A Life in Exile

Today’s verse in the fourteenth chapter of Proverbs is especially for parents, but also for grandparents, aunts and uncles, and everyone else who impacts children through teaching or service. We know that faith in Jesus Christ changes our lives, but it also bleeds over into our relationships with others—it cannot help but do so if we are serious in imitating Christ in our words and actions.

This is why we are focusing on just this one verse. I want us to think about the implications of what it tells us.

In the fear of the Lord one has strong confidence, and his children will have a refuge. (Proverbs 14:26 ESV)

Read this sentence through a few times. We are going to break it down, bit by bit.

The fear of the LORD

If it is in the fear of the Lord that we have strong confidence, let’s make sure we remember what it means to fear the Lord, or YHWH, Jehovah God. After all, the fear of the Lord is mentioned A LOT in this book.

In his introduction to wisdom, Solomon told us where it all begins. “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight” (Prov. 9:10). Without this reverent awe toward God, wisdom is nowhere to be found. It starts with this right relationship with the God of Creation. When we know God and keep Him in the place of highest honor in our lives, we have a grounded understanding of who we are in relation to Him. He is God. He is Sovereign. He is in control. We are not.

In our fear of the Lord, we also know that He is good and works all things for our good. I’m not pulling this out of the air; these are all truths from Him, from His Word. I know Him for who He is from what He says of Himself and what the Word teaches us.

The Lord passed before him and proclaimed, “The Lord, the Lord, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, but who will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children and the children’s children, to the third and the fourth generation.” (Ex. 34:6-7)

All we learn of the Father in the Old Testament, we see in His Son, Jesus Christ, in the New. The I-Am statements of Jesus in the book of John alone move us to stand back in wonder at His greatness and love for us.

To fear God is to allow Him to increase as we decrease.

In that fear comes confidence

Because we know that God is in control, sovereign, and works all things for our good (our benefit), as we keep Him on His rightful throne, we stand strong and confident that He has our future in His hands.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. (Jer. 29:11)

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. (Rom. 8:28)

Because He alone sees from the end to the beginning, we know He’s got us and can move forward in life, no matter what comes our way, with confidence and purpose. We are like the one who built his house on the rock.

“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.” (Matt. 7:24-25)

In the fear of YHWH, we stand on the rock, that is Christ, our firm foundation.

For it stands in Scripture: “Behold, I am laying in Zion a stone, a cornerstone chosen and precious, and whoever believes in him will not be put to shame.” (1 Pet. 2:6)

The refuge for our children

So the foundation for this verse has been established. We, who fear the Lord, live lives of confident assurance. That confidence becomes a refuge for our children. What does that look like?

It’s the opposite of a shaky foundation

Remember the second part of Jesus’s illustration about those who hear His words? While those who hear and obey stand on a firm foundation, even in the face of storms, those who ignore his words are like the person who falls under pressure.

“And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell, and great was the fall of it.” (Matt. 7:26-27)

When parents crash and burn at any sign of trouble, children pay the price. Who can they trust if their parents blame everything and everyone but themselves during hard times? When a parent lacks a firm foundation of faith, children have no example to follow, and will flounder in life as well.

A crumbling house is no refuge.

The world is scary; the home is a place of peace.

When parents or grandparents are known by children for their confidence in the Lord, their homes are places of peace. Children, faced with questions and doubts because of what they’re hearing or seeing out in the world, need a place that is known for something solid. Adults who are confident in the Lord can be the go-to resource for children overwhelmed with the noise and voices they’re hearing through school, on social media, or from friends.

At the end of a hard day at college, will a child search out the calming influence of a parent, grandparent, or adult, knowing they are different from their professors or fellow students? If they’re offered alcohol or drugs at a party, will they run to the refuge that is firmly established as a welcoming place for them?

The confidence we gain from our fear of the Lord serves as a refuge for the children in our lives. Knowing that we trust the Lord, these children will seek us out to gain peace and rest. May the Lord establish our hearts and minds firmly on Him and His Word, that our confidence in Him will grow and build a lasting refuge for the children in our lives to His glory.

Grace and Peace

If you missed the last Friday Focus post, click HERE, or start this Walking in Wisdom series from the beginning.